Podcast Transcript
SUMMARY KEYWORDS
step backwards, kangaroos, animals, episode, kangaroo, cliche, bit, people, emu, tortoise, perspective, walk, talk, wallabies, depends, opportune, life, baby, happen
SPEAKERS
Daisy, Kathi
Daisy 00:02
Welcome to the Mindset Evolution Podcast, powered by Selfrecoding, world class consulting and coaching services that you can access at selfrecoding.com. Selfrecoding is a unique blend of neuro healing modalities that will empower you to reach your full potential. Join 1000s of others who have experienced rapid results in their journey of personal growth. Now enjoy our show where we bring you tools for powerful mind with your hosts Kathi Tait and Daisy Papp.
Kathi 00:33
And hello, everybody, and welcome to another episode of Bald and Blonde Mindset Evolution, the podcast that gives you tools for a powerful mind. I'm Kathi Tait, your host from Australia. And with me, as always your host, Daisy Papp from America. Hi, Daisy, how's the other side of the world today?
Daisy 00:55
Well, so far, so good. And I'm glad to see you and I'm glad that we're embracing the globe from these very different geographical locations. And I appreciate you taking the time and I appreciate that you take the time in the morning, while I'm able to take my time in the evening. So, it just lovely and for you. It's winter. For me, it's summer, so things are very different. And I'm so glad that we do what we're doing. So, what's up your sleeve?
Kathi 01:22
Yeah, I should have said how's yesterday shouldn't I? Well, actually, today, Daisy, I have an Australian theme, which I hope our audience thoroughly enjoys. The title of the episode, as you guys may have seen is Kangaroos and Emus. A bit cryptic. I know, so let's jump in. Kangaroos and Emu's are both Australian native animals. And they both appear on the Australian coat of arms. What is super interesting about these two animals, which I learnt at school, and many people will not know, is that neither of those animals are able to walk backwards. Isn't that fascinating?
Daisy 02:09
What a great metaphor. 1,000 pictures, just bling bling in my head, because oh my goodness, how often do we take steps back. And these two courageous animals have the fortune that they can't. Most of the time, there's a good side to also taking a step back, I get it. For example, when I want to gain a different perspective, when I want to see it from a different angle, or I want to see it a little bit from afar or emotionally getting a little bit further away, distance myself from things. But we can also turn around and leave the scene. So, it's not only that we need to be able to walk backwards. But that's very interesting, dear listeners, I promise it's not going to be a biology class.
Kathi 02:53
No, not at all. Except to say that the Kangaroo is probably one of the most unique animals in the world. It is crazy cool. They have their baby, right?
Daisy 03:08
Yeah,
Kathi 03:09
in the normal way that a mammal would, they're born live. And this tiny little baby kangaroo or Joey as we call them, it's only a few centimeters long, it looks like a jellybean. it crawls its way from where it's born, all the way up into the kangaroos pouch. And that is where it is nurtured and grows. How cool is that? Like, I don't think there is another animal that has a pouch like the kangaroo that nurtures its baby that way. It is just fascinating. It is an amazing animal. Of course, there are many cousins to the kangaroos, there's Wallabies, the two most common but we have a whole range of them over here and they are fascinating. They're also like super strong, super fast. Their tail is amazing. It keeps their balance and they actually lean on their tail and fight with their back legs. Now they're an upright animal. So, they walk on two legs or jump rather on two legs. But to see one fight is quite crazy because they can be up to seven feet tall as well, the big kangaroos. They're an amazing animal if you have never seen one, have a look at them, they're fantastic. Anyway, that aside, not about biology, but I just had to say that because I think that they are one of the most amazing creatures on the planet. Emu's probably more familiar because they're much more like the ostrich. I think they're like a cousin to the ostrich so people will be more familiar with what an emu is. And I don't know for sure that the ostrich probably can't walk backwards either.
Daisy 04:51
I wonder if any bird can?
Kathi 04:54
That's a good question. I don't actually know and maybe it isn't possible, but it is a great metaphor. because often we undermine ourselves by walking backwards. And I think that often that comes from a place of self-doubt.
Daisy 05:10
Could be, it can be also from other people expressing their dislike and their disapproval. Sometimes we received disapproval without having self-doubt, but it's the smarter way to take a step back. I think the metaphor is really brilliant, it is very important to understand our own inner world, why we do what we do when we do it. And I go back to the Island Model because it is so easy to understand, I think humbly. By the way, we're working on a book for children, where the Island Model is going to be shown to children so that they can already grow up with that knowledge, with that metaphor. And there's nothing wrong and taking a step back, it's the question, why do I do it? And when I know more about myself then I will be able to utilize what's within me, my tendencies, my weaknesses, my strengths, great communicators oftentimes, consciously take a step back. Nothing wrong with it. The question is, when do we do it? When you're a ballroom dancer, it's great that you can take steps back, because you go this way, then you go that way. Ever seen how they're dancing a rumba, for example? Or a waltz? Nothing wrong actually, with stepping backwards. I think it is more important that we know why we do it, when we do it and how come we do it? And what is the next step after we took a step back? I think it is important to acknowledge that there is a place and time for many things.
K
athi 06:46
Yeah, I agree, I do believe there is a time and a place to step backwards. And I liked what you said at the beginning, that stepping backwards can help you change your perception and can help you see things from a different perspective or a different angle. I like to do that quite a bit, especially in times when I'm struggling or confused or unsure of what to do. I try and put it into play then, take a step back and try and see it from another point of view. Now sometimes that will be from another person's perspective. And I'll take onboard someone's feedback to help me decide what to do. Sometimes it would just be within myself that I'll just go, okay, I need to pause and just let my brain sit with it for a day, especially if I'm writing something I've found, this is my thing that if I'm trying to write something, and I'm trying to say something very specific, and I can't get it out, then I'll put it down, I'll step away and come back to it later. I don't know, but I think something happens in the subconscious when you're working on something that is tick, tick, ticking away. And then if you leave it for a bit and come back to it with kind of fresh eyes or fresh perspective, then that can be the key that you needed to for it to all fall into place for you. So, I find that's really important to be able to do that too.
Daisy 08:19
Yes. I think it is also interesting to look at it from the perspective of a fruit, for example.
Kathi 08:26
Did you say fruit?
Daisy 08:27
Yes, when it comes to writing. Maybe it's not ripe yet. It's still working. It's still in the making. It's still in the growth process. It's still expanding. It's still developing, it's still in its evolution to become. And yes, I'm not standing here under my friend's mango tree and look at the mangoes and wait, ah so when are you going to fall down? No, I step away and then I come back in the afternoon is there maybe one that looks almost ripe, and it's really fun to harvest mangoes with that interesting tool that you have. It's like a little basket on a stick that you can expand. I didn't even know that they existed until I saw it there at my friend's house and we were harvesting the mangoes. So yes, take a step back and let it sit. Wait for a while. Look at those who make whiskey for example, here in Tennessee, world famous whiskey, they produce it and then they put it in the barrel and then they really step back. They leave it alone. So, it also has to do with patience. How often is it that we feel so active and overly active, I must do something, I must do something and instead of thinking about it more deeply or more in detail then we step in and we make things worse. Sometimes it's a good idea. Yes, step back. Have a look. Let it sit. For example, when you're at the ocean, then there comes a big wave and from the bottom of the ocean, it swells up the sand. You don't really see where you would step but then you wait It's a little bit the sand settling. And then you could see again, you see the bottom. So, I think it is a good idea to understand that many things and many adages are many cliches have their stamp on it, or they label, the evaluation, positive, negative. Most of them are not neutral, because it's one or the other. Some people say, yeah, that's great. No, no, that's not great. And when we just think about it, and let it settle for a while, when there's something new out, and I'm speaking from my own perspective, my own experience, when I have a software update that I'm required to run on my electronic devices, I wait, because I want to know, what are the bugs, and then I read some reviews. And only when the reviews start getting better, yes, they fix the bugs, that's then when I do it, I don't need to be the first to get the worst software.
Kathi 10:53
So, I think there's probably times in our lives when we shouldn't walk backwards too.
Daisy 10:58
Yes, as I say, it depends on time and place. It's a very simple example birth canal, those who were not born with a cesarean, those who were born naturally, they all passed the birth canal, you better don't step back, you better don't go backwards. There's only one way out. That's how we arrived here. That does mean that in every single situation of our lives, it will be good to go head forward, that would be good. That's the more convenient way for the baby and the mother, it doesn't mean that I need to go through everything when there is some resistance with my head. It goes back, I think, to being aware, to have my values in order, to value my values, make them my standard, and then decide on the spot, based on a situation. I don't think that there is a rule of thumb. That is the one case scenario where it is mandatory or opportune to step back. Maybe there are statistics that okay, for example, when I see two dogs fighting, yes, I step back, I don't want to get in the middle of it. I don't want to be confused because I have long hairs so then they think I'm the hairy dog amongst them and then I get chewed and bit. No, no, no, no, no. Rule of thumb is maybe a good idea to step back when two dogs are fighting. When two humans are fighting, maybe it's also opportune.
Kathi 12:19
Yeah. Now there's another cliche too that I think is worth mentioning, which is the old two steps forward, one step back.
Daisy 12:27
Yes, unless you're dancing. When you dance, it's very healthy, and it can look amazingly elegant and proper. Now, when I sometimes work with a company, for example and they want to excel. They want to excel in their industry, they want to expand, they want to grow, they want to better themselves, they want to have a different quality of communication in their internal functioning, then sometimes it is a good idea to okay, let me move ahead. And then let's say, let's take one step back, let's have a look at the whole picture. And then let's again, take two steps forward, I really think that there is no such rule that can be a good guide for us. When it is appropriate, is it appropriate, when to never do it? I'm not sure if these exist. I admit I never thought of it before, if there is a rule of thumb.
Kathi 13:21
Yeah, well, actually, it's interesting how you just spoke about that with the company you've worked with. Because in my experience, when people use that cliche, two steps forward, one step back, it's usually meant from a frustration point of view, where they've had an obstacle come up. So, in my culture, when we would say that it would be I've got momentum, I'm getting there, I'm kicking goals, I'm moving forward, and then something happens and got in the way. And that's the one step back. So the point of what I'm saying is again, all in how we look at it, because two steps forward, one step back, can be an expression of frustration that an obstacle has occurred, or it can be looking at it, you're going forward, you're achieving the goals you want to, now let's step back and get some clarity and make sure we're on track. So that's a much more positive way of applying that cliche and I think that's super interesting, even looking at something like that from both perspectives, and you can see then which way do I want to put that in my life? Which way am I going to think about it? Which way am I going to use that cliche, if that's the cliche, and that applies to anything, doesn't it?
Daisy 14:41
Mmm
Kathi 14:42
We can look and do things from a positive, encouraging, moving forward perspective, or we can look at things from a perspective that will hold us back. And last episode we mentioned self-talk, and I think that that's super important. Once again, it is in everyday life, isn't it? Because it's that self-talk that will perceive or make us feel a certain way about this step back. Is it a good thing? Is it a bad thing? Is it needed? Is it getting in my way? Is this how I want it to go, whatever the case may be.
Daisy 15:20
I think it is important to notice that when there are things that are happening outside of our control, then accept them and be creative is I think, a good rule of thumb and re-evaluate. Now, the evaluation process, I think, is very crucial, because everything we perceive goes through the evaluation process, because we have bias brains, so positive, negative, neutral. And okay, when I'm somebody when I'm held back, or I feel yes, there's a step back, now I need to take a step back, or I'm forced to take a step back, yes, I can very much empathize with that. Because, yes, there are happening things in my life too that I'm finally on the road straight ahead, and poof, something happens and uh, now I need a new strategy. But the question is, so what do we do with it? And again, the self-talk that you mentioned, we have 70,000 thoughts a day; they come and go, the average human has 70,000 thoughts a day. Now, I can choose how I'm evaluating these thoughts. When I speak, for example, with a veteran who has seen things you and I would never want to see and I don't wish it upon anyone to see what they've seen and what they lived through. The evaluation of what they perceived will make all the difference, especially once they're back from combat. Now, the stories we tell ourselves are not always true. Most of the time, hint, hint, we're big, fat liars, oftentimes, therefore, when something happens, and then I verbalize oh, yeah, I needed to take a step back, or it is a step back, I'm moving not ahead as much as I want. But actually, let's have a look at it mathematically. Two steps forward, one step back, still brings you closer towards the goal when you're in the right direction, right? Because it's plus two minus one plus two minus one.
Kathi 17:13
Yeah. And there's the story about the hare and the tortoise. Have you heard that nursery rhyme?
Daisy 17:18
You mentioned it.
Kathi 17:19
Yeah, I think I did bring it up in another episode. For our audience that don't know it's a kind of a fairy tale from my culture, where there's two animals running a race. And the hare is the fast animal and goes the shortcut and rushes and rushes to get to the finish line. And the tortoise just slowly and methodically plods along. And during the story, lots of things happen to the animals. But the crux of the story, or the meaning behind it is that often slow and methodical is what will win the race because you're being consistent and you're taking a step in the right direction, methodically, and the sum of two steps forward, one step back is one step forward.
Daisy 17:20
Yeah
Kathi 17:22
So that is the tortoise, it is slow and methodical. And challenges are always going to arise. Obstacles are going to happen. Like, I not so much expect them as know that probably something will pop up. That's life. Let's face it.
Daisy 18:33
Yeah, it's part of life. Exactly.
Kathi 18:35
Life is not easy. It's not smooth. It's not simple. It doesn't always go the way we want it to. Things happen. And so if you can have a mindset that allows you to be open to being creative around the things that happen, I find that helps me deal with them a little bit easier, because they're kind of inevitable, and to allow them to throw me off track every single time would mean you wouldn't get that net one step forward, you'd get stuck. So, I think keeping on going, however you can, is one of the keys .
Daisy 19:16
Depends on the direction.
Kathi 19:18
Sure.
Daisy 19:18
Don't keep on going when you're going the wrong way. Oh, oh, I wouldn't do that.
Kathi 19:23
We did a whole episode on speed or direction. That might have been when I talked about the hare and the tortoise.
Daisy 19:29
That's possible. Yes. I totally forgot that. We did that as an episode. Yeah.
Kathi 19:34
Yeah.
Daisy 19:34
So, I think again, it all comes down to what meaning we give it. In whatever item I have here on my desk, I can find a good meaning. And it will be a little bit more challenging for me to find a bad meaning because I'm trained and that's my attitude, and that's my habit. Now I can see in everything something bad or I can see in everything something good and that depends on me. And I'm not going to give that power away to anyone. I know of people, they have a problem for every solution, and I know people, they have a solution for every problem. Now, which one are you? And now is maybe a good time to step two steps back and have a look at yourself from the outside, which is, I understand, physically impossible, but try to see yourself a little bit from the external. Is that what I'm doing? So, you see the bias brain, oh, yeah, I had to take two steps back, or I had to take a step back at all does not necessarily mean that it's a negative thing. I'm the one who gives the meaning. And then it depends what I'm doing out of it.
Kathi 20:37
Yeah, absolutely. And look, I've got to say that this episode didn't really turn out like I thought it was going to! (laughter). It's been a really interesting chat about maybe the importance of stepping backwards, that there are times when we need to do it. And so maybe the kangaroo and the emu are unfortunate in that they can't.
Lucky they are animals, not people.
Daisy 21:01
Well, they have one less option.
Kathi 21:03
Yeah, that is true.
Daisy 21:04
I think the good news is that when we have options, and most of the time, we have options, that then we can choose wisely. And it's absolutely okay to take a step back. And it's absolutely okay, when life throws you stones, and then you can build a castle out of it, that's what some people say. Or you can use them as stepping stones, you can make a beautiful stone sculpture out of it. Many opportunities are in there. So, what you do with the opportunities, what you do with the circumstances, and what you do, it's really depending on every single situation, when is it a good time to step back? I prefer being able to take a step back, maybe sometimes even several steps back than not being able to do so. But then I can choose, then it's up to me, instead of not being given the opportunity to do so. Or the ability or capability like the kangaroo or the emo, bless them, bless them. Cute little animals. Wonderful. I met some of them when I was in Australia.
Kathi 22:04
Well, I would say big animals!
Daisy 22:06
No, I find them cute!
Kathi 22:06
But they're not little by any means.
Daisy 22:13
baby kangaroos are really cute.
Kathi 22:14
They are and wallabies are gorgeous. In fact, we have a whole park right across on the next block where I live. And we drive down that street every morning to go to the gym, my son and I and we get to see the wallabies hanging out in the paddocks every day. They're quite beautiful. And they're small and cute.
Daisy 22:34
Yeah,
Kathi 22:34
for sure. So that's it for this episode. Audience, we would love to hear what you think about walking backwards. And what you think about the Kangaroos and Emus. Have you ever seen them? Look them up. They're amazing. We thank Selfrecoding for sponsoring our episodes as always. And we thank you, our audience, our supporters for going to baldandblonde.live, hitting the Support Us button and sharing some of your resources with us so that we can stay on air. Thank you again for your time and sharing every episode with someone you love because we know that it will help them all. We'll be talking to you real soon with our weekly episode, so make sure that you chain in and if you haven't heard them all go back and listen. It's been a really interesting journey over almost three years now. I think next week is actually our anniversary so make sure you're listening to that, it's going to be a very special episode. Final thoughts, Daisy,
Daisy 23:39
well please subscribe and give us a review that helps the algorithms so others can find us more easily.
Kathi 23:46
Absolutely. Thank you for adding that in. I do forget to say that but we do want you to subscribe, guys and share. That's it from us today. We are Bald and Blonde
Daisy 23:56
Mindset Evolution. Talk to you next time.
Daisy 23:59
Thank you for listening in to the Bald and Blonde Mindset Evolution Podcast. Please share our show with your family and friends. Together we make this world a better place for you, for us, for future generations. When you need consulting or coaching visit selfrecoding.com Also please remember to rate us five stars and leave a review and support us at baldandblonde.live. Talk to you soon.